Rich Bitch Syndrome

A few things:

First: Poverty does not cause people to commit acts of crime. Lack of values does.

Second: Entitlement is not just for the underprivileged.

Paris Hilton Is Ordered Back to Jail
By MARIA NEWMAN
Published: June 8, 2007
A judge today ordered a tearful (oh boo-hoo! I feel for ya, Par, I really, really do.) Paris Hilton back to jail, reversing a decision by the Los Angeles County sheriff to release her and keep her under house arrest after she had served only five days of a 45-day sentence.

Okay, first of all, by what authority does the Los Angeles sheriff override a prosecutor and a judge's sentencing? I read an article earlier today when Paris was first released quoting some yahoo in the Los Angeles "judicial system" stating that cutting sentences short like this and releasing people early was not unique to Paris. Because of overcrowding, the county jail released people all the time.

Really?! Because if that's so, why not bypass the court system all together. Let's just take a page from the mental health/medical system. Here's the scenario:

Cops intervene in a rape/robbery/assault/what have you. They call the admitting desk at the local county jail and ask if there are any current spaces open. The admitting desk clerk states that currently there is a 30-day-plus wait. The cops page a triage legal assistant from the DA's office. (There would be several of these available on an on-call basis.) Several hours later, the triage legal assistant arrives and interviews the perps (yeah, I'm down like that with legal lingo). They take into consideration the following in their evaluation:

1. How serious were the perps in executing their plan and did they succeed?

2. Were there any obvious victims, i.e., someone dead or seriously maimed?

3. Was it planned in advance?

4. Were they under the influence of an unnatural substance, something beyond Red Bull.

5. Do they have a record? (or maybe that isn't really relevant)

6. Are they poor/rich/celebrity/fat/minority/etc. (This would count in the perps favor.)

7. Was their mother/father/brother/aunt/uncle/sibling/priest/rabbi/pastor mean to them or molest them in any way, shape or form? In Paris's case, this could include her parents denying her a convertible until the age of 12.

8. Are they really sorry, or at least say they are, and/or do they accept the Lord Jesus/Allah/Krishna/Joseph Smith/or some facsimile of a religion (Al Gorism counts)?

After having input this information into a handy-dandy computerized sentence evaluator on their Blackberry, an estimated sentence is calculated by the software. If the sentence is estimated to be twice the amount of the wait time, then the cops can then proceed to the nearest county jail and then they can go through the traditional judicial system.

Unless, of course, you're a celebrity, in which case all of the above is moot.

Superior Court Judge Michael T. Sauer said that Ms. Hilton will have to serve the entire sentence he had handed down last month for repeatedly violating the terms of her probation on alcohol-related reckless driving charges stemming from an incident last year. (What a novel idea. Serving your entire sentence! Wow. What will they think of next?)

As Ms. Hilton was led away to await her trip back to jail (I wonder if they'll do a cavity search. There's no telling what she might have up her ass), she turned to her parents and said, "It’s not right!" (You're damn right it's not right. It's not right that you're back in court after having only served 5 days of your sentence. It's not right that your parents are so rich and influential that they can buy off anyone that crosses you, including the judicial system. It's not right that someone like you has come to believe your own press--that you're special and the usual nasty legal implications of actions don't apply to you.) The Associated Press reported.

The hearing had been delayed for more than an hour after Ms. Hilton and her lawyers insisted that she be allowed to talk to the judge by telephone, instead of appearing in person. (Indeed? Why bother making a trip to the court, when I'm only going to end up back here at home, right? Waste of gas. I'm environmentally conscious that way. I just hope I can be an inspiration for young people everywhere.) The judge would not allow it, and ordered a sheriff’s deputy to drive to Ms. Hilton’s mansion in the Hollywood Hills, where she was handcuffed and brought in. (Oh, to be the proverbial fly...)

As Ms. Hilton was driven back to court, her trip followed by news helicopters, she cried in the back seat of the police cruiser. When she entered the courtroom, where her parents were also waiting, she broke down and sobbed. (Again, boohoo. Wow, contrast this with her press announcement after the award show. What happened to the brave face, Par? Hmmmmm?? No deal waiting in the wings? )

Sheriff Lee Baca set off a furor in legal circles and beyond when his office announced on Thursday that Ms. Hilton would be allowed out of jail and instead put under house arrest because of an unspecified “medical condition.” (I have inside information that she has a serious case of Rich Bitch Syndrome "RBS". Highly contagious among millionairesses--more serious the bigger the bank account. Can be terminal when net worth reaches the billions. There is currently no known cure. Once infected, there is no antidote. Unfortunately for Paris, her case was genetic. She can't help it. She was born into it. It could have been prevented if her parents had taken the appropriate measures soon enough, but as in most genetic cases, it is often too late once it is diagnosed. Her case was further complicated by inexplicable celebrity. Tsk, tsk.)

The city attorney whose office prosecuted her case, Rocky Delgadillo, said it was a case of preferential treatment for a celebrity. (Ya think?) He asked the judge to order Ms. Hilton back to jail and asked the sheriff’s department to show why it should not be held in contempt of court for letting her go in the first place. (Well, that ought to be good. Do you think a precipitous 6-digit rise in the sheriff's bank account is sufficient reason? And, no, there is no decimal, only comma. Beautiful, beautiful comma. It's like winning the jail lottery!)

“We cannot tolerate a two-tiered jail system where the rich and powerful receive special treatment,” Mr. Delgadillo said after learning of the release. (Here, here. Bully, bully. *clearing of throat*)

Officials had said Ms. Hilton, a hotel heiress and cable television star, (about time you should have to pay to see "Simple Life." Hey, Paris, look up! You could do a sequel sans Nicole. "Simple Prison Life." See--you can do this! After all, prison is just "a simple life," right? Just pretend there are cameras, muck it up, and play dumb or be dumb or whatever that dumb thing is that you do) would probably spend only about 23 days behind bars because of automatic credits for good behavior (Ah yes, the well known good-behavior-automatic credits, riiiigghhtttt), but prosecutors had not expected her to serve only five days. (Huh. Fancy that.)

Najee Ali, a community activist in South Los Angeles who heads Project Islamic Hope, said he was disappointed in the sheriff’s decision. (Disappointed? I'm disappointed when my dog barfs on my shoes. This? This was not disappointment.)

“It’s shocking that we’re living in a star struck judicial system,” he said. “Sheriff Baca caved in to the star power, the celebrity and wealth of the Hilton family. What happened is unprecedented. (OJ Simpson anyone?)

“There are hundreds and perhaps thousands of inmates in Los Angeles County jails who have much more serious illnesses like AIDs, heart problems and they have never been released to go home.” (Oh, you silly, innocent immigrant. You don't understand. Nothing is as serious as RBS--Nothing.)

The county supervisor, Don Knabe, told The Associated Press: “What transpired here is outrageous.” He said he received more than 400 angry e-mails and hundreds more phone calls from around the country. Ms. Hilton’s return home gives the impression of “celebrity justice being handed out,” he said. (I just don't see how you can make that conclusion based on the facts.)

City attorney spokesman Nick Velasquez said earlier Thursday that the office had been “inundated with calls and emails from people,” with “100 percent of them” angry (What? 100 percent? Not 99.9 or 99.98 or 99.999?) about Hilton’s release.

Mr. Delgadillo said that no one had shown that Ms. Hilton suffered from any malady that could not be treated while she was serving her sentence. “Los Angeles County Jail medical facilities are well-equipped to deal with medical situations involving inmates,” he added. (You don't understand!!!! This is RBS we're talking about. You don't have the capacity to treat this kind of malady! You just don't!!!! You just don't! You...just.. don't... *sob*)

Meanwhile, sheriff’s department spokesman Steve Whitmore told KNBC-TV that the contempt accusation “appears to be another Rocky Delgadillo press stunt.” (Yea. Obviously. What a bozo suggestion you should be held in contempt. Please.)

“We’ve examined documents (passport) and will respond accordingly in court,” he said. (Yeah, court--as in the court-yard of my hotel in a beautiful tropical area with a fun name like...Tahiti!)

But even within the sheriff’s department, others disagreed. (*sigh* Some people will just not listen to reason.) Steve Remige, president of the Association of Los Angeles County Deputy Sheriffs, told KNBC that the system definitely worked in Ms. Hilton’s favor. (Wow. It's just amazing how they always manage to come up with the obvious.)

“It appears that in Los Angeles County, if you are a wealthy individual or famous individual, that you are getting preferential treatment in the county jail system, in the county criminal system,” Remige said. (Yes. It appears. We've never seen anything quite like this before in Los Angeles. It is truly an anomaly.)

The news about Ms. Hilton dominated news coverage today. At CNN, the news was breaking during the cable news network’s daily CNN International news hour. The Paris story led the show after one commercial break, coming even before updates on the G8 Summit and Italy’s Rendition Trial.

“It’s the kind of day where we’ll always have Paris,” Stephen Frazier, one of the anchors, said, trying for a wry delivery.

I don't generally make a habit of commenting on or paying (much) attention to celebrities and their naughty escapades, but this just goes beyond your common celebrity gossip. There are just so many things wrong with this story I can't begin to comment. Suffice it to say, I am disgusted with our justice system in general and this was just one more straw.